Reading time: 10 min
Fear in the eye of an Entrepreneur
I've been an entrepreneur for years, but my journey with fear started long before I ever built a business—it started when I was a teenager in Istanbul. I was not a very good student in high school, primarily because I had no goal in life. There was no one to direct me. I did not even know what I liked to pursue. My peers were not very ambitious and all they cared about was fame. I grew up in Istanbul, Turkey. I was not popular, tall, or good looking. So I asked myself quite often, “What am I doing with my life?”. I felt all eyes on me—my parents, teachers, and peers. It was so hard and confusing to satisfy all of them at the same time. What was the point of studying so hard? Who even became a scientist, or a tech billionaire in the history of Turkey through education anyway? We just consume the tech and products made in the west. Everything was pointless. I just hated my life, and feared for wasting my life and future.
Then in 2013, when I was about to turn 16, I had a chance to visit the US for 10 days with a few classmates, the land of opportunities as they say. And it completely changed the way I looked at things. I was truly amazed, and was not the same person after my return. At that point, I was certain I wanted to study and live in the US for the next few years of my life. It was not the cool buildings, infrastructure, or the Times Square that hooked me into this idea but the people of the US. I just loved how everyone just minded their own business, and had their own free identity away from any judgy eyes. Everything was unique, and so normal. No one cared where I came from, how I looked, or what kind of shoes I wore. They were too busy focusing on their own life and goals.
In 2015, just a month and a half before I turned 18, I moved to the US for college. It was the most challenging and the best experience I have ever had. I learned so much; finally I had a purpose, and an aim. In my mind, I knew I was doing the best thing among my peers. No friend of mine back in Turkey was pursuing what I was doing. It felt so magical, and so worth the sacrifice of leaving my dear family behind.
I was studying engineering in one of the most prestigious schools in the US, and also acquiring amazing English skills that I knew would help me later in life in many cases. I was studying day and night, over the weekend, in other words, virtually any time I had a chance. I loved studying, and the libraries were my home. By the time I graduated, my GPA was over 3.90.
I was so proud of myself, a first-generation college student with a high GPA. I felt invincible. But then life hit me, and that feeling vanished. I was so focused on my classes, and getting so much joy from studying, I totally neglected what career I was going to pursue. There were so many options. So when I graduated, I found myself in the same shoes as I was back in my high school years fearing for my future. My father wanted me to join his embroidery manufacturing business but I wanted to pursue an entrepreneurial route in engineering, science and technology. I feared the latter, and after my dad’s constant nagging, I chose the textile industry.
I worked in textiles for 5 years, the first 3 years was in the US and that failed for many reasons, the last 2 years was in Turkey which also failed ultimately due to market demand. Now our family business is closing, and we are in the midst of selling all our machines. On top of this I just got engaged, so you can perhaps sense the fear I am having.
At this point I am just asking myself. What's the source of this fear and pain? I believe it is because of the uncertainty. I am uncertain what I will do and whether I will be successful. Now that I am out of textiles, I am officially diving into technology. Life has brought me to this route 5 years after I initially intended. It may sound strange, but I'm so happy our family business failed. If it hadn't, I would have never truly immersed myself in what I loved to pursue—an entrepreneurial path in technology.
But now the big question is what kind of technology, what will I even provide to the people. Would I focus on individuals, businesses or both? My heart goes for businesses, because they all share a main goal: be profitable, and keep going. Plus, a business is a collection of many people, and it affects many more people along the way such as logistics, and the end-users.
If I want to help businesses, now I need to decide the kind of the business so I can find them. I like the idea of helping manufacturers with technology, so they eliminate their waste, and ultimately maximize their productivity and hence their profitability. Manufacturing is the backbone of the economy. It benefits everyone, and exports increase the value of their currency.
I have a degree in Industrial Engineering, and have 5 years experience in manufacturing and distributing. Back in my college years, at our engineering department, we had a poster that stated that “Engineers make things, Industrial Engineers make them better.” I really liked it. We are all about optimizing processes via eliminating waste in operations. So I believe I will focus on ways to make plants run efficiently and cut their waste as much as I can with the available technology.
I want the tech I provide to be as minimal as possible, because I do not want to bore my clients with excess tech that they do not really need. The best toolkit for lean production is no toolkit. If you can just do it intrinsically that is better than any combination of software and hardware.
This is why I'm fully diving into my new venture, nejum.com, while fearing for my life, whether I can fully support my family. The name nejum comes from the combination of my parents names: Nejla and Cuma, to honor their hard work while building their family and sacrificing their life over their kids. I have a year's worth of savings to try and fail, but not a clear idea on how I would pitch my venture to any manufacturer in Turkey.
Eventually I would like to provide makers of all types with a small package of DIY automation kits, where they can measure their own productivity, and optimize their workflow with no code required. If they prefer a service instead, then I can help them set it up.
I know this was a personal blog rather than an informative tech one, but I guess it does feel better to share a personal story, and how it all came to this.
Here's to facing our fears and building something meaningful.